FREEZE! If You Don't Move, She Won't See Us!

From Jim:

Okay, I had to post this before I got sidetracked here at work.

I get up every day and go to work at 5:30AM for Physical Training. I'll usually check to see if Abbie is on AIM around 9AM. Today, I get a call from her at 7:56AM. I never talk to her before 8AM unless there's an emergency.

So when I got her call, my heart sank b/c it could only mean something has happened to Cooper or Bear.

And I was right.

Abbie is quite upset and almost ready to go into a panic attack it sounds like. She starts out with, "Your children..." That's not good to start the conversation that way.

"Your children opened..." Uh oh.

"...and ate..." Oh damn, they ate something under the sink that's not good for them.

"...the chocolate on the table." Huh?

Seriously? They ate the chocolate on the table?

Turns out that while Abbie was in the bedroom changing and getting laundry together, the boys decide to work together and poach the sugar-free chocolate bar that was sitting on the table. She apparently comes out, and they've already eaten half the bar. Imagine this in your minds eye...Bear and Cooper eating this chocolate bar saying to each other, "mmmm, that's damned good. Shhhh. Don't let momma know." Abbie notices its really quiet in the living room and when she walks out, they suddenly stop chewing as if to say, "Stop chewing. Freeze! She may not notice us standing here with chocolate in our mouths." As if Abbie was a T-Rex that only sees movement. They were caught red handed and guilty as all get out. And they knew it! They knew they were doing wrong. I'm sure that if they could talk well enough, they'd deny it 100%.

This chocolate is called "ChocoPerfection". It's a sugar-free, dairy-free, wheat/gluten-free chocolate bar that tastes exactly like chocolate. Its great for diabetics in case you're wondering. Abbie and I have had a few bars lately as a treat and the boys have noticed us eating them wondering what they are. Turns out, they now know.

Abbie was so upset. I laughed my fool ass off. It was bound to happen, and little boys are prone to doing something like that. I can remember being a little boy at Cape Cod and me, John, and Chris went to the local candy shop and spent all of our allowance on candy, which we weren't allowed to do, and as we were coming back to the cottage, we saw Dad and Mom. We ran around a sand dune and dumped all of our candy on the ground. I don't think we got caught, but I remember being really upset that my candy whistle I had been sucking on was covered in sand.

As for the boys, we don't know if they're immune and digestive systems are ready to handle refined foods such as ChocoPerfection, so we're going to monitor their reactions today. Abbie mentioned that one of them may already have been having a reaction. This is one of those reasons we're really picky about the boys eating...they just don't react well to things that others can handle.